Tag Archives: mythology

Curious?

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You’re in excellent company if so. I know I am. Always have been.

Curiouser and Curiouser

I think I talked about this before, but in case you missed it šŸ˜, I gave up on the “Children’s Library” in 3rd grade. I remember the day, although not the date, as if it was some sort of ritual. It was quiet, so quiet, and felt like walking into a church, especially after the chaos and bright colors of the children’s library which our library hid in the basement.

Because I do have a “touch” of OCD, I stared for a minute, looking at the plaques with the Dewey Decimal System codes on each bookcase, and decided to start where one always ought, at the beginning. I headed to the 000.00 section and began.

Things have changed quite a bit since then, but almost 50 years ago now (YIKES!) the 000.00 section began with the “unexplained.” Now, they’ve shoved computers in there as well, and who knows what else. In my day, though, I found ghosts, vampires, folk magic, witchcraft, and so much more. The Unexplained was right near to religion, psychology, and mythology, and it’s a miracle I ever made it out of that aisle, but I do remember making it all the way to history, which if I remember right was somewhere around 500-600. Again, though, its been many, many years so I could be incredibly wrong. I buy more than I borrow these days, so I don’t even really know what kind of changes have happened in all that time.

Also, we have a very disappointing library. It looks like a cathedral, a HUGE cathedral, but it was as though they paid for the building and didn’t have money for the books. After we got our own internet service, I didn’t hang out there nearly as long as I’d done at the library where I grew up. Sad, but true. šŸ˜¢

Curiosity, I tell you, guided my every step.

When I started https://highspiritsdivine.etsy.com, Ā I hit up ChatGPT because I hadĀ no idea what to call the Email Most people seem to use some variation of V.I.P.., I hate that. It just bugs me. Second, it doesn’t remotely fit the brand I’m trying so hard to stick to. The AI gave me four or five options, as I recall, and one of them was Curiosi. I knew, immediately, that this was theĀ one. Because Curiosity, I realized, is the one character trait weĀ all have in common.

By all, I mean all. When you look at everything that loosely gets thrown into that umbrella of “Pagan,”Ā (which really just means not a Christian, or worse, not educated. It was basically an insult, like calling someone a hick.)Ā it’s a huge mishmash of not-quite-related paths. There are some that seem very Christian based, or at least Abrahamic such as Ceremonial, Enochian, and even Christian witchcraft and most branches of ethic folk magic. At the other end of the spectrum, yet still within the Christian mythology, you’ve got Gnostics, and Satanists from Atheistic Satanists to Theistic Satanists. Then there’s Polytheists in both Hard and Soft forms, meaning some see Gods as different entities, and some see the Gods as different faces of some bigger deity that’s imperceptible by humansĀ unless we break it down into smaller bite-sized chunks. And that’s not all because there are witches of every single stripe from Atheistic to Theistic, Voudou to Earth Magic. Applachian Granny magic to Hoodoo. Manifesting to longer recipe-based spellwork. Enochian and Sorcerers summoning entities to perform services. Chaos magicians who…well, do whatever they like.

HOW do we lump us all in together? We all have some things in common, but none have all things in common. It’s not like other religious beliefs where you’ll have differentĀ denominations, and they all have at least the major deities in common. We’ve got bupkis, nada, zilch. Sometimes it even seems like we have no common ground at all.Ā 

But we’ve gotĀ curiosity.

If we didn’t all have this in common, every single one of us would still be participating in the religion and religious practices of our parents, grandparents, going back generations. I never would have picked up a book in the “Unexplained” section of the library, let alone “Drawing Down the Moon,” by Margot Adler, which was my gateway into paganism. I’d have accepted the Greek Myths in the context that they were given to me; stories from ancient people who didn’t understand anything and used mythology to explain the world around them. I certainly would never have even entertained the idea of casting a spell, even in a Christian context.

I remember Mary Trump said, although I don’t remember where, that her uncle (the president) had absolutely no intellectual curiosity. That was the first time I’d heard anything of the sort, and it seemed something incredibly terrible and, well,Ā boring. After contemplation though, I realize this is one of the biggest differences between myself and “the squares.” Many humans are completely satisfied learning the bare minimum in school, watching reality television, working at the same job or whatever job they can find in something of a zombie state, eating the same food all their lives.

I just can’t. When I got a new text book, I’d thumb through it excitedly and get mad when I’d get the syllabus and it wouldn’t cover some of the more interesting sections. So I’d read them anyway. I have one of my mom’s textbooks from college, I bought it used on Ebay (its not the same copy, she’s still got hers) because it explained the Anglo-Saxon wergild system, and their culture, better than some of the more modern books on the subject. When I opened an English textbook to read Samuel Coleridge Taylor’s poems after I’d seen a movie, I got stuck on the first poem, Beowulf, and started reading the book there.

I wish curiosity were contagious. This would be a far better world if more people had it in larger doses!

This is the glue between us. The books, the tomes, the online discussions on every forum going back to the AOL chatroom days forward. We all have a vital curiosity that drives us. Our paths wander and meander through different practices as we discover new information, meet new people, exchange techniques and theories. We grow in so many different directions, but at the same time, we allĀ grow.

My curiosity is insatiable. I have said over and over again the day I stop learning is the day I start dying.

 

 

Free to Worship or Not

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My years in Christianity weren’t exactly a waste, for all that they were debilitating to my psyche, I did learn quite a bit. Some of that was definitely painful and hard to extract from my brain later in life, some of it was life-changing and highly influential on my future spiritual and magical life.

First and foremost, the Bible became one of my hyperfixations. Well before I knew what that was, I had begun reading books about “The Book.” You’ll hear zealous Christians constantly push reading the Bible, over and over again. Memorizing verses, reading obscure books out of it, and of course, believing the interpretation of whatever guru-type-pastor is in vogue today. If you’re the type that doesn’t passively read, if you’re the type of person who thinks and analyzes while reading as I am, this is a sure-fire way to read yourself back out of Christianity. Because that’s exactly what happened.

I’m not just fixated on Christianity, I’m fixated on religion, and on mythology as well. When I started analyzing the Flood, for example, and realized that comparative religion and mythology had many similar tales, the passive reader might expect that is because the story is true. An active reader? I realized that yes, there were many similar stories. And I realized several were older than the earliest written Judaic text mentioning the story. So logic would have the older story as the more likely original.

Ummmm…

If you’re wondering, this is still something I’m absolutely obsessed with, although I find it rotates regularly with other fixations now. As an adult, I don’t have quite as much time to devote to these studies of mine. I’ve added into the mix cults and what I’d call para-religions. I feel a kinship with people who have escaped cults, likely because of all they have in common with the Evangelical/Charismatic religion I’m a refugee of.

Oddly, as its something I had to wrestle with, I also felt the presence of a god for the first time.

You can imagine, I’m sure, this was a real bear to merge together. I threw out Christianity whole; baby and bathwater altogether. But at the same time, I had experiences that could not easily be dismissed.

In the tradition I was raised in, there were three positions taken by the acolytes. The crucifer who carried the cross, and then the others who each held a torch on either side of the cross and just behind for the procession and recession. What I began to understand quickly is that the person who is the crucifer is the focus of attention and energy from the congregation. And in ECUSA, as in other traditions, there’s a reverence that’s given as the procession passes. If you’re even remotely sensitive (at the time I was very closed off energetically, its really amazing anything got thru at all, that will tell you how much I’m talking about here), you can’t help but feel that energy. You’re a funnel, taking all that energy, and its going through you to its destination.

And yes, that destination is a Deity. Ironically, most Christians don’t have any idea of this at all.

I did, and I do. It gave me a great deal of difficulty as I threw the entire belief system out, and wrestled with all the condemnation that came with that belief system. I embraced several different versions of paganism one, after the other, and every single time had to wrestle with where “God” and “Christianity” fit into my life.

Santeria and Voodoo were the worst. Those born into those religions have no compunction at all about blending African spirits with the Christian God, Church, and all its trappings. They don’t even blink. It hurt me so horribly, I can’t even explain it. Its like trying to use an overnight bag when you’re going to be away from home for a month. It just didn’t fit.

Here, at this place in the story, is where my hyperfixation comes in handy.

There are a lot of gods actually written of in the Bible, most of which are buried under layers of culture and mythology. Two are closer to the surface than most; Elohim who is actually a pantheon of gods under a primary god named El (Get it??? Beth-El??? After you’ve seen it once, El is everywhere in the Bible…I love tying things together like that!), and of course Yahweh. Thing is, both these gods were Canaanite gods. Remember the Canaanites? The ones the Hebrews were instructed time and time again to steer clear of? Those same Canaanites is exactly where their primary god came from, a mix of El and Yahweh. Turns out the Hebrews very likely were Canaanites who split off and claimed this God as the god of their tribe.

El and Yahweh have little else in common, frankly. El is the wise, old, white-haired gentle father god, and Yahweh is the vindictive, cruel god of storms, lightning and punishment.

This is the moment I became an Omnist. I see it so clearly now that its ridiculous. There are indeed two different gods of the Bible, or at least there are two primary and active gods in our world today. There’s Yahweh, the god of Evangelicals and Conservatives who instructs hatred of the fellow man, cruelty, and war; and El, the god of peace, love, and understanding who we learn of through the Christ of the New Testament.

Now, saying that either of those gods are gods doesn’t mean that I am called to them, or have any need to worship them. I can recognize that they exist along side my own Spirits because two things (or more) can actually be true at the same time. I don’t need El or Yahweh, and they don’t need me. I belong elsewhere. That doesn’t mean I’m going to tell you that you don’t belong with one or both of them. That’s your business not mine, and I’d no sooner try to tell you who to worship than I would tell you who to have sex with or not, for that matter.

I am now free. Free to work with Spirits who are under the reign of Christ or El (I’ll keep away from Yahweh as much as I can, but thanks anyway) such as those Spirits of Voodoo or Ifa that I love, and not have to give up my pagan ways. I can follow new pagan and magical directions as my own Soul guides me because I do get instruction directly from my Spirits; and who am I to say that my Brigid is your Brigid? Perhaps she’s different, and then has different requests and needs?

That’s a whole other can of worms though. I’d best stop here or I’ll never stop tonight!

This blog post was written after I’d begun my evening “medication” (medical marijuana) please forgive any awkward phrasing or grammar, I will go back over it when I’m in a more sober state of mind. Expect editing!